Problem is, nobody wants him, or should I say, nobody wants the remaining 3 years/$48 million dollar contract that’s attached to his aging 34 year old body and sub-zero UZR.
So two camps have formed here in Rangerdom, there’s the Casual Fan/Pandering Local Sports Columnist Camp who think Face has been jerked around and is owed something by the Rangers because of his tenure and his “sticking with them through the bad years” — then there’s the rest of us.
The Rest of Us Camp acknowledges that Face has been a good player and team leader for the Rangers the last ten years. We also acknowledge that he’s “stuck with the team” because in 2007 he signed an lucrative 5 year/80 mil contract extension. We then have the nerve to acknowledge the aforementioned sub zero UZR (-4.7 or -5.4, I forget), which means he’s a huge defensive liability (hence, the signing of Beltre). THEN we acknowledge the fact that… oh, I think you get the picture (this is beginning to sound like a religion vs. science argument).
Face claims he’s been jerked around by the Rangers because they’ve repeatedly asked him to change positions over the years. First, they asked him to move from 2B to shortstop in order to accommodate Alfonso Soriano after the A-Rod trade. Then SS to 3B to accommodate the up and coming Elvis Andrus. Now, they’ve asked him to move to DH/utility infielder to accommodate Adrian Beltre. I guess I can see his point, because no team has ever asked someone to change positions.
Oh, wait, yes they have.
Face, I like you, but shaadapp and play baseball. Your gold glove days are behind you, dude, accept it.
I must apologize for my two week absence, BAPL Nation, but quite frankly, I’ve had absolutely nothing inspiring to write about.
I’m pretty much sick of politics and the commie/collectivist takeover of our country; I live in bible-belt Texas where even my closest, supposedly non-believer friends are religilous sympathizers, so ragging on silly bronze age fairy tales is becoming hazardous to my personal life; and finally, my favorite MLB team is once again off to a mediocre start with any hopes of new, competent and responsible ownership in limbo. Oh, and my fantasy team’s starting rotation sucks.
So instead of any inspired topics today, I’m just going to whine about some things…I’ll try to keep it in the realm of baseball:
* The Rangers ownership situation sucks. Our current dewsh-bag owner, Tom Hicks, has desperately been trying to weasel his way around the deal he struck with the Greenburg/Ryan group because his dewshy creditors feel like he could get more money for the team. MLB has stepped in to take over the sale, but honestly, what freaking leverage do they have against Hicks’ creditors? And it’s not enough that this idiot Hicks continues to keep the Rangers in mediocrity hell, he is also the owner of the NHL Dallas Stars, who have now had two consecutive non-playoff years of mediocrity thanks to Hicks’ idiocy. Thanks to him, the Stars’ former head coach is on the verge of leading his new team, the frickin Phoenix Coyotes, to a first round win in the Stanley Cup Playoffs. Great move firing Dave Tippett, Mr. Hicks. Moron. And if I paid any attention to Soccer, I’m betting I could point out that he’s screwing up the Liverpool FC…but really, who besides un-American furriners gives a crap about Soccer?
* The kind folk at Rangers Ballpark failed to put the “Jonestein” plate on my season ticket seat. This is supposedly going to be resolved by the next home stand. I’m still irritated though, they managed to get my buddy’s plate on his seat. Grrr.
* I was going to bitch about Michael Young killing my fantasy team with his horrid first three weeks at the plate, but it seems he’s on a tear, especially yesterday when he had a 5 RBI day. I lost anyway…I could blame Mike but I’ll blame the anemic San Francisco Giants offense for not coming up with two lousy runs to give my starter Matt Cain AT LEAST another no-decision…this cost me 5 points, the difference in my loss. Even better, I’ll blame my center fielder Torii Hunter for his atrocious 3 point performance last week…s’what I get for drafting a Los Anaheim Angel.
* As much as I can’t stand Christian rock bands and that insidious brainwashing group at iamsecond.com, I gotta hand it to em, they help pack the stands at the ballpark when they have one of their smarmy Christian rock concerts on the north lawn. Saturday’s game against the Tiggers was freakin packed with delusional church groups forking out their dough to the Rangers rather than filling the coffers at their delusion factories. I suppose that’s the upside to them being there.
* I sprained my ankle about 3 weeks ago and it’s just now getting better. It has been a pain hobbling up to the ballpark so far…but hey, I’m a trooper.
* I’ve managed to avoid two Sunday’s worth of “God Bless America” and the threat of “patriotic” rednecks pummeling me because I refuse to stand during that idiotic song and the guilt-compelled, God-laced “patriotism” thrust upon everyone by the PA announcer. How? I have legitimately had to pee after the top of the 7th at every home game this year.
* On the bright side, my season tickets rock. We’re on the third deck, right behind home plate, about 4 rows up. The pic to your left is pretty much the view, though it doesn’t really do ’em justice. We are right by the escalators, so post game escapes are a snap. Also got season parking so getting in and out of Arlington is pretty easy.
Aside from the bumbling April play from muh boys, I’m hella pleased with my 2010 season ticket purchase. I’m actually going to try to make all 81 games this year, but will probably be foiled by my arch nemesis, the 100+ degree Sunday day games that, thanks to ESPN and their stupid exclusive Sunday night broadcasting deal, forces me into said heat when all summer games in Texas should clearly be held at night only. I’m beginning to despise ESPN, and not just because frickin Sports Center is constantly screwing up my Tivo’d episodes of Baseball Tonight. Grrrr.
Apologies for the sensationalistic title, no one died at this year’s All-Star Game that I know of(unless you count the NL.)
No, I’m talking about the Grim Reaper himself making an appearance at the mid-summer classic, sitting in the best behind-the-plate seats money can buy.
As I sat watching the game on the tube, I found myself LOLing out loud at almost every pitch to the plate thinking, “Damn, how did Death get such a primo seat to this thing? Not even the Obamessiah has that good of a seat!”
Not sure how I feel about Death being a big baseball fan.
ANYWAY, here are some other thoughts, cheers, and jeers on this year’s shindig in Saint Louiee:
1. Cheers to the St. Louis fans for cheering on the All-Stars, regardless of their team affiliation.
2. Unless, of course, you affiliate with the Cubs, in which case, Jeers to the same St. Louis fans for booing Ted Lily. I know it’s a rivalry thing, but have some fking class for god’s sake.
3. Cheers to Prince Fielder for winning the Home-Run Derby.
4. Cheers to Nelson Cruz for representin’ da Rangers in the HRD.
5. Jeers to me for trying to sound Hip-Hop in the previous sentence.
6. Cheers to Albert Pujols for being a class act and a great “host”.
7. Jeers to Adrian Gonzales for appearing to snub Pujols when Albert left the field. Was I the only one who caught that? AG appeared to be acting like a major league d!ckhead. I could be wrong here, he may have just been mesmerized by the hoopla.
8. Cheers to The Obamessiah for wearing his White Sox jacket and not being a politically-correct tool about the team he roots for…and double-cheers for him seeming so personable and genuine. I may not like his interventionist, trickle-up-poverty policies, but he does seem like a great guy.
9. Cheers to Michael Young for that awesome line-drive-grounder snag at third.
10. Jeers to Michael Young for grounding into a double-play after Josh Hamilton went to the trouble of getting a single. (I’m kidding)
11. Cheers to Curtis Granderson for that awesome triple that helped put the AL on top.
12. Jeers to Joe Maddon for his Tampa nepotism at the end of the game, loading the field with Rays.
13. Then again, cheers to Joe Maddon for his Tampa nepotism and putting Carl “The Catch” Crawford in the game at center field.
14. No, no, I gotta go with “jeers” to Joe Maddon for not putting in Nelson Cruz and Tim Wakefield. :^)
15. And finally, cheers to the AL for yet another win and for securing home-field advantage for my Texas Rangers during this year’s Fall Classic.